THERE'S A PLACE FOR US - Chapter No.10 - "There's a Place For Us"

“There's a Place For Us” - Danny Saucedo and Eric Saade fanfiction story written by Nika H, the admistrator of “Danny Saucedo Fans” at facebook: www.facebook.com/DannySaucedoFans.

Please, do not repost, copy, and/or change any part of this material without asking permission and crediting ME and “Danny Saucedo Fans”.

All events described here are purely fictional, unfortunately :(

Copyright © by Nika H, “Danny Saucedo Fans”.

Chapter Ten – There’s A Place For Us

Time passed. There was no sight of Danny – no calls, no messages, no e-mails, no nothing. He just did not want to see, to hear, to know about – me.

All I knew, thanks to his girlfriend Janna, Erik and Matte of E.M.D, and the press - was that he was O.K.

I listened to what London told me once, I stayed away from him, I gave him time – as much as he would need.

I did not want Danny to be hurt, I did not want Danny to suffer.

I did not want this to get worse – and I knew, my presence, will lead to that.

“If you see things go wrong with Danny. If you see that your love and your presence do not lead to good for him, let it go – before it gets to late.”
As london said to me.

I tried to be normal – for Molly, for my friends, for my family.

The weird part of it, was that I actually succeeded.

I went to Spain with Molly and our families for my vocation, I continued my summer tour called “Made of Pop”, I hanged out with my friends...

Of couse, I have been missing Danny like crazy. It’s not that there was no pain, no vain – it’s that this time, I learned how to control it.

I left those feelings and my tears to the time I was alone, locked in my studio.

One day, as I got home, Molly was waiting for me – with a letter.

-“Eric, this is for you, from Danny. I’ve found it in the mail box today” She said, and handed me the letter.

What the fuck? Why Danny writes letters to me? What have he written in this letter what he couldn’t say to me... on the phone, face to face...? I thought, as I oppened it, and begun to read.

Eric. I am so sorry for doing things this way, knowing it is wrong and cruel. But, it’s the only possible way left for us, trust me, it will be the best – for both of us.

I will not lie telling you that I don’t love you anymore, because I do, truly – I do.

I love you Eric, I love you more than words can express. I will always love you.
It doesn’t change anything, tough. Sorry.

No, I do not want to go – but aswell, I cannot stay.

Yes, I want to remember – but aswell, I need to forget.

There are so many words trapped inside me, words I would like to tell you.

Yet, all I can write, is this pathetic goodbye message. Sorry.

I sincerely hope you will forgive me one day.

I swear that my heart will remain forever yours.

Te amo. Te quiero. Lo siento.

Who knows?

“....A world when you and I belong,
When fate and love will keep as stong,
Exactly who we are is just enough...

There’s a place for us... There’s a place for us...”

Everytime I will close my eyes, I will see your face.

Everytime I will dream at night, I will dream of you.

Sorry it has to be this way.

Sorry nothing could be changed.

Love is not enough sometimes.

Adiós,

Danny.

The blood run out of my face, the letter fell out of my hands.

I stood here, in front of Molly, shocked and speechless.

-“Eric!” She said, -“Eric you alright, what the hell is going on?” She demanded.

I could not answer her. I remained silent.

Molly looked into my eyes for few second, and then, hesistately, she picked up Danny’s letter from the floor, and begun to read it.

I did not stop her. I saw no reason to do it, now, that everything was officially over.

I had the feeling deep inside me that the end was near.

But hearing... the final words was something I could not handle.

If before, I had the smallest hope for us – not it had vanished away, leaving what’s left of me behind.

Vad vore jag... utan dina andetag...?* I thought.

-”So... it was Danny. All the time it was Danny... I knew it.” Molly said, and handed me the letter back.

-“I’m sorry Molly.” I said, willing to fall down on my knees and beg for pardon if that would be necessary. Losing her I would not stand.

-“Me too...” She said.

-“For what?”

-“For what happened to you with Danny. I think I understand now, more or less, some details are missing, tough... Can you tell me?” She asked me.

I did not answer. Not because I did not want to, I just... couldn’t get those words out of my mouth. Physically and mentally.

-“You need to be alone.” Molly said, as I remained quiet. It wasn’t a question – it was a statement, and God, the girl was so right. –“Then go away, Eric – go to your studio, be alone as much as you need. I will be waiting for you, always...” She said, leaving me with shocked expression.

-“Molly... Molly... Thank you, for everything. No words enough to tell you how much I love you.” I said, and hugged her. She hugged me back.

-“Jag vet det, Eric, jag vet...”** She said. –”See you, then. Call me when you are on your way home – I’ll cook something nice.” She added, and continued –“Don’t worry Eric, you can tell me the whole story... when you will be ready. I understand. Who knows? Maybe I will figure it out myself...”

-“Maybe you will, you’re smart.” I told her.

-“Anyways, see you Eric – you need to be alone.”

-“Yes, I do” I admited, and walked away – to my studio.

As I walked to my car, I let my thoughts to run freely in my mind. Those thoughts brought back all I wanted to deny and hide in the past weeks.

I knew it.This time it was final. This time it was really the end.

The letter Danny had left pretty much said everything.

The letter Danny had left was the only thing of him I will own.

I got in the car, and headed to my studio – I needed some time alone, by myself.

I looked at the letter, and begun to read it again.

Te amo. Te quiero. Lo siento.

Sorry it has to be this way.

Sorry nothing could be changed.

Love is not enough sometimes.

Meanwhile, tears were streaming down my face – as I was losing something I would never be able to replace.

I felt as if I was swimming in the ocean, in the middle of a storm. I was lost, and I was losing control, and drowning. Slowly, I was going down – and my air suply was being taken away from me.

I had no air. I coudn’t breath.

But yet, the desire – to live – has burned inside me.

I did not give up, I kept on fighting – until my last breath.

It was the break of dawn, I had no disire to go home – I needed some time on my own, by myself. So it will be just me, in my studio. Pain is one of those things you face alone.

Quietly, I drove by the city straight to my studio. Trying, as hard as I could, concentrate on the road and built a shied, and will protect me – from the hurt and the vain, from the emptyness, and the pain.

When I finally reached the studio, I slowly locked the door of my car, afterwards, I headed to my studio.

Suddenly, as I reacher its’ door, I realised it was already openned.

What the fuck? My studio has nothing valuable that can be stolen, I thought to myself.

It was dangerous, I knew it. Tough, at that point, I simply did not care – or more correctly, I simply haven’t tough. In addition to the following, the curiousity inside me was burning – I just simply openned the door, walked in, and frooze.

My shied, the shied I was trying to built – to protect me from the cold, from the rain, from the emptyness, from the pain, and vain...

My shied, my protection – has fallen apart, as if it never was, as if it has never existed at all, I could feel it falling down, I could feel its’ pieces on the ground....

It all happened in one single moment, it all happened because of one single look.

I was drowning in the ocean, the ocean of my emotions, ilusions, memories.

Danny Saucedo stood near the window, with his eyes closed, his face lighten by the sunlight, was so beautiful.

He seemed to be concentrating on something else, he didn’t even notice me.

-“Danny...” I called him quietly.

Immediately, Danny has oppened his gorgerous deep blue eyes, and looked my way.

Even if I could run to a land, that would be far away from the ocean, it would not save me from the huge flood coming my direction – this time I did not fight back, I gave up, and let it all – rain over me. Sigh.

He stood there, in my studio – looking at me with tears in his eyes, and sad smile on his face. He sighed when he had seen me, and his blue eyes looked at me – as if he was filming me in his mind – as if it was the last time we saw each other. He said nothing.

-“Danny...” I said, as I got closer to him –“Danny, it has been a while...” I added.

He remained silent – still not saying a thing – he had just nodded in agreement.

The silence was too much for me to bear. I couldn’t stand it. Simply I couldn’t.

-“Danny, you’re killing me! Say something!” I said, and looked at him with pleading expression. –“Please... Danny...” I added, in a soft tone.

-“Sorry Eric...” Was all he had managed to say in return.

-“Is it the end then?” I asked him, and felt my knees shaking.

He had closed his eyes, few tears streamed down his face – meanwhile he confirmed my worse possible nightmares ever.

-“Yes... it is the end... of the road, of our road.” He said.

As broken as I was, nevertheless, I have decided to put all possible effort – and stay strong, don’t fall apart, to be brave – and face the reality.

I will not look for an espace this time, I will stand on the line – and fight.

I did not fall down on the ground.

He had not seen me cry.

As much as all I wanted was to go, to disappear,

I have stayed – I did not run away.

The funniest thing was the fact I wasn’t doing this for me, not at all – I was doing this for him, for Danny. Even that now, when thinking of his name – that brought so many memories up in my mind, so many broken dreams  – hurt me so much.

It haven’t changed a single thing. I love him. I will always love him.

I knew he loves me aswell, maybe his feelings are even stronger than mine, who knows.

I knew he was doing this for me – for us – because he thinks being apart is better for us.

Who knows? Maybe he is right.

Danny doesn’t deserve to suffer – he had enough of pain for the past weeks, including near dead experience, that was caused because of me...  That was  why I haven’t said a single thing, that’s why I did not let to my tears to fall down, my face to show signs of pain, my eyes to express the emptyness.

I smiled at him, and reached toward him in order to give him a hug – probably for the last time in a while.

-“Thank you for everything, Danny...” I whispered softly in his ear, as I hugged him.

Danny hugged me back, and made me realise how I will simply miss him.

How I will simply miss his beautiful smile.

How I will simply miss his gorgerous blue eyes.

The warmth of his body, the kindness of his heart... Sigh.

-“Goodbye Eric.” He said after the hug, and left.

Leaving everything behind.

*From Swedish: ”What would I be... without your breath?” Lyrics from “Utan Dina Andetag” song by the Swedish rockband Kent.

Kent is one of Danny’s favourite bands, and “Utan Dina Andetag” is one of his favourite songs by them.

**From Swedish: “I know it, Eric, I know...”

EPILOGUE – “In The Aftermath”

I haven’t seen Danny since that day. Of course, I saw him in public events, on the TV, on the radio. I read about him in magazines, newspapers, the internet.... but it wasn’t the same. We haven’t met since that day, the final day – for us.

My life was fine, could have been better – but also, it could have been worse. I am not complaining. I am so lucky to have friends and family who support me, and Molly...

Molly’s reaction to what had happened caught me by surprise. She is so patient, so caring, so... loving.

Shame – this is exactly what I feel now, knowing how unfair I was to her. It’s a miracle she takes me as I am and forgives me for everything now.

I often caught myself thinking what would I do, who would I be without her. Now I realise; I’d do nothing, I’d be no-one. Without Molly – I would not survive, I would be lost – like a small leaf, that fell from its’ tree.

Well, maybe Danny was just right when he said that it is better for us to be apart. He has Janna, I have Molly.

And maybe he wasn’t... Who knows? - God only knows...

It doesn’t change a thing, however.

I’m still loving him.

****

TO BE CONTINUED! (maybe...)